2012/11/09

The Novel Autobiography of James Weldon Johnson

It may be that she ne'er knew that she gave me a sword-thrust that mean solar day in school which was years in healing (19).

He is made to feel shame for himself and for the do workings of his mind, and this shame is linked in his childhood with his romantic spirit and the stirrings of sexual desire:

I remember one day at school, after we had given in our notebooks to have roughly exercises corrected, the teacher called me to her desk and said: "I couldn't correct your exercises because I run aground nothing in your book but a rhapsody on somebody's brown eyes." I had passed in the wrong note-book. I don't mobilise I've felt greater embarrassment in my whole life history than I did at that moment. I was shamefaced not simply that my teacher should see this nakedness of my heart, but that she should find unwrap that I had any knowledge of such affairs. It did not t presentfore occur to me to be ashamed of the kind of poetry I had written (30).

The male child seems whiteness because his preceptor is white, and he fails to enlighten that he is different. This emphasizes how much racial attitudes are learned preferably than inborn, for children do not have these attitudes naturally. The narrator learns from his teachers, from his principal, indirect


The boy has trouble relating to the black people of Atlanta, at last those in the lower social class who do it in his neighborhood: "The unkempt appearance, the shambling, slouching gait and loud babble out and laughter of these people aroused in me a flavour of almost repulsion" (56). He is friendly with a pullman-car porter's beer who insists on difference with him at one point, creating an embarrassment the boy feels more and more: "For the instant his friendship bored and humiliated me. I had visions of another meal in the greasy restaurant of the day before" (58).

Johnson, James Weldon. The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man. New York: Vintage, 1927.
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And here he stood before me, just the kind of looking father I had wishfully pictured him to be; but I made no advance toward him; stood there feeling abashed and foolish, not knowing what to say or do. I am not sure but that he felt reasonably much the same (33).

ly from his mother, and from the way others react to him as he grows up, including his father, whom he meets when he is twelve:

Then look at the terrible handicap you are placing on yourself by going home and working as a Negro composer; you crapper never be able to get the hearing for your work which it might deserve. I doubt that even a white musician of recognized ability could succeed there by working on the theory that Ameri commode music can be based on Negro themes (144).

He in addition finds that the black man has been made to feel ashamed of a number of things for which he should not feel shame at all, things marking his heritage, things for which he is made to feel ashamed because authorized whites want him to feel that way:

There are a great many colored people who are ashamed of the cake-walk, but I think they ought to be proud of it. It is my effect that the colored people of this country have done four things which refute the oft-advanced theory that they are an absolutely inferior race, which bear witness that they have originality and artistic conc
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